A statue

So far, my life has been mostly unremarkable as far as being in the public eye goes. As far as being in the private eye, that has been extremely remarkable, but because it is private, cannot be remarked on. Yes, I know, it is a shame. I am not dead yet, and no one ever knows what the future might hold for them. So, it is possible I could lead a resistance, or a movement, I could lead a country, or I could take over Texas, and then France, any of those things could make me famous. I might even father a country, that sounds enjoyable.

If such events take place in my future, there could end up being a statue erected in my honor. "erected in my honor" is a good phrase, I am glad I just coined it.

I don't know how statue makers go about making a statue, especially of someone who is already passed on to the great beyond. I have not had to register any measurements anywhere in the event that after I am dead, a statue of me is erected. So, how does anyone decide what I looked like? My fear is some statue maker would get pictures of me from who only knows, and that is how they would form the statue. Seriously statue guy, my high school year book pics, off limits.

As many, or the 3 or 4 of you that read this, of you know, I work out. Maybe not everyday, but enough to be hard. Plus I come from the streets. But while my abs are hard enough to reflect bullets, I have to add a little extra to keep at my fighting weight. All this to say, I look good, but not like the thinker, or atlas, or that really huge guy at my gym that sings really loud with his headphones on, but no one will tell him because he is that huge and scowls all the time.

So, 2008 is going to be the year of the statue. Or, The Year of the Statue. I am going to shed pounds, and drop under my fighting weight. It is important to be thin and trim, even if only for a short time, in order to have a lot of pictures taken of me for the statue that may or may not be erected in my honor. I have to look good as a statue, I don't want to be immortalized as portly, or thick. I think I might even mark the pictures as "in case of statue" or something.

At the foot of the possible future statue I hope it either says simply "Erected in my honor." or, "There is a fine line between glib and jocular." Obscure, perhaps. But true, the line between being jocular and glib is thin... Thin and dangerous.