A brand new award.

That's right. I know you're brimming with excitement to see if you won. Believe me, as the person handing out this award, I wish a lot of people could win it. I wish I could roam the streets handing out this new, prestigious award to many people I encounter during the day. However, maybe this award should only be given out yearly, like to someone at the academy awards? Or maybe every business should give out this award to an employee once a year. Here it is, businesses give this new award to an employee. The employee who gets it gets to decide the next recipient and present it the following year at an awards ceremony, perhaps during Christmas time when most companies have a holiday thing anyways. The award you ask? As suggested by The Police in Sincronicty II, "The Humiliating Kick in the Crotch" award. You know if you receive it, you will train like a place kicker for the next year until presentation time. The sacrifice you will go though to hone your kicking leg's muscles into that of a tightly wound berserker robot. The anger you will release while passing on your utter humiliation in the ritual of passing on the reward. Almost like that movie Pay it Forward. I was vying for the Humiliating Kick in the Crotch, but I think Steve from accounting is going to get it this year. Coveted and feared. Non gender specific and publicly humiliating...