All NEW! Low Res Printer...

Wouldn't it be nice to create fake news paper articles about people you don't like:
"Local man caught in sex scandal with monkeys." and
"embezzlement charges dropped in face of much more serious and bizarre crimes." and
"Cadaver Penis found, local man charged."

Or, fake news articles about yourself"
"Local man given humanitarian award" and
"Local man recognized for blah blah blah good stuff" You get the picture.

But now if you create one, you have to print it up on regular note book paper and a sweet laser printer, or at worsest a nice ink jet printer. It won't look authentic at all. Hopefully, soon, we will be releasing an ultra low grade printer that will print that cheap, smudgy ink like news papers use. Also, it will only print on that crazy thin paper news papers use. Last, we will include a pair of scissors you can use to cut your fake news paper to give it those news paper ridges along the bottom. You can be using this kit to print fake news paper articles about hated co-workers and about yourself in no time.